With you around - Yellowcard

So, How is your life going? Does anyone actually read this?

Yeah, I don't know if I care if this is even being read, just that I'm writing it. Don't artists feel that way? I'm definitely not an artist so I wouldn't know that.

Although... my Organic Chemistry 2 notes are looking more like art than chemistry. All those lines and O's. It is truly looking like another language.

June 29th marks a year writing this blog. Thinking back to where I was a year ago, it amazes me how much has changed in my life.

A year ago, I was sitting on my couch in a not so nice neighborhood trying to think of a way to avoid Calculus II homework, so I started this blog. I'm not going to lie and say it's changed my life so much I could never live without it. Because a blog hasn't changed my life that much. I've been writing in a journal for years. Blogging has just kinda taken over my journal, making it more accessible from all places I am without getting weird looks for writing in a book.

My life has changed. A year ago, I was preparing to be a friends wedding. Getting those fake nails, meeting all the relatives. Yeah, and now I haven't talked to her since the day before the wedding really. My 'best' friend from a year ago, I haven't talked to in... forever, she dropped me like a hot potato, and now she is married... The guy I liked, lives in Sweden and plans on staying there. The guy I dated in 2010, went out with him recently and actually used the phrase 'free meal'. I got the most amazing dog, Melano, and have a super close relationship with my sister and my family. I still work at the same place, and I'm still taking Calc II.

I'm closer to God than I was. And I'm more grown up, or at least have more responsibilities than I had. I'm proud of how far I have come and where I am going.

Oh, and I'm getting a deathly hollows tattoo this summer :) woot!!

Teenage Dream-Tylar Ward

Have you ever notice how covers of some songs are MUCH better than the original songs? I have a ton of covers. Pop, Punk, Top hits, 80's, orchestral and much more. I have at least 2 playlists on my mp3 player devoted to covers. This is popping into my head thanks to the Glee station I'm listening to on Pandora.

Do you try to 'cover' someone else's life or actions by redoing the original thing with your version of it? I hate to admit it, but sometimes it seems like all I do sometimes is 'covers' of other's actions and words. I quote movies instead of coming up with something original and funny to say. I copy pranks, and I sing other's songs all time.

The more I think how much I copy others, I wonder who I actually am. Am I funny without other people's words? Am I serious student without my parent's ambition behind me? Don't get my wrong, I love who I am now, but it would be interesting to see who I was without all these 'covers' in my life.

Then again, sometimes the covers are truly better.

Who are you 'covering'?

Romans 12:2: Do not conform any longer to the patters of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of you mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is. His good, pleasing and perfect will.

Candles-HeyMonday

Everyone around me seems to be getting married. Just from my old sorority there have been 4 weddings so far this summer. That's not counting people I know from outside the sorority (3) and then I went to a Yellowcard concert Tuesday and the singer from RunnerRunner (the band that played first) played the song he wrote for his fiancee` to walk down to the aisle.

It just seems that everyone is getting married and moving forward with their life, and here I am, still just working and going to school. In the fall I start my fourth year of college, not counting the college class I took during high school. If it was my fourth and last year, I think it would be a different matter all together, but it's my fourth out of six years. I mean, I'll come out with a masters degree (which is what I console myself with), but it still feels like my life is at a standstill. Especially because I am retaking some classes I didn't pass within the last year this summer.

I'm still loving my job, and my boss just went on vacation for 2 weeks, so that puts me as the main person for my duties. I'm excited about that, the time that I did things by myself went well last summer, we used what I worked on just a few weeks ago and they worked out well. If it's vague, it's because I assume most people are squeamish.

Medical school is starting to gear up, so we're going to be getting everything ready for that, but most of the preparation for SOM will take place during July. I'm glad i will be gone for the start of med school in August, I don't want to deal with all the drama that med school students bring. Where I work is their first 'block' (10 week class) in med school all around, so everyone is on edge, especially with all the... people.. that they work with.

I was asked by a high school friend to lunch last week. He used to be a really good friend, and he was up here for a wedding (surprise!!). All he talked about at lunch was himself and his friends that were getting married. I must say when I got back from lunch, and my sister asked me how it went, it was the first time I used the term 'Free Lunch'. On the bright side, it was wonderful, non-healthy new mexican food. Yum green chili.

I had an opthamology appointment this week, I hate the appointment, but since Melano chewed up the ear pieces on my last pair I was excited to get new glasses. I get to the eye doctor and was instructed to take out my contacts and sit at some machines so that they could look at all aspects of my eye. This is always kinda stressful for me because I am always scared that i will wind up with the wrong prescription for the next year. Because of my migraines and health issues, they always have to look into my eyes and assess everything. These appointments usually take awhile for me, and I come out with a headache from the different prescriptions I tried out. I sat down at one of the tests, and watched a center 'square' (or so they told me that is what it was, I couldn't exactly see it) and watched for squiggly lines to pop up and I would push a button. I did this test on both eyes, then they repeated the tests. I was escorted back to a room, told by the Dr to stop over analyzing it, and then asked to repeat the test again. By then I was a little worried, but what would I be able to do about it? Unlike school, you cannot study for these tests. After the printout of the test came back, I was escorted back to a room where the Dr was, and he explained that I have a blind spot in my vision. And that this blind spot could just be the test messing up, or my migraines having a larger influence on my vision that we had expected. Long story short, I get to have a retest in awhile.

Everyone that I have told this to, tells me that I am very calm. I politely respond 'What good would hysterics and stress do at this point?' I attribute this attitude and peace to God, who has kept me going this week.

Another thing that happened, I was dropped out of my Organic Chemistry 2 class that I am taking over the summer. I found this out when I went up to get my test from my teacher yesterday and he didn't have it, saying I wasn't on a list... So now I'm spending a lot of time jumping through hoops to get back into the class and get all of the ensuing drama under control.

Other than that, life is fairly normal. I'm busy at work, consume my extra time with reading or the latest TV show that I have found, and keep pressing on. I know God has my path laid out, and I am so thankful that He does, but I guess sometimes I just get antsy waiting for his divine timing.

-Whit