OneWays

Is my life like a one way road? Is it just me going to my destination with people merging on and off my one lane, one way road?

Now that one way street is including talking. I mean, loosing friends is one thing. Having them just stop talking to me is another thing. Hiding my heart in the Lord yadda yadda. It still hurts. A stopped talking to me, unless I make her talk to me. I'm so excited for school to start so I can meet some new people and not have to think about all this crap.

Today at work was humbling. I didn't know the answers to the questions, and so I felt like a total idiot. I mean, I'm the one that has the answers. It felt better when I went back and showed them how to do stuff. I'm not good not knowing things. Not looking forward to the rest of the semester of not knowing anything about it.

It took long enough, but I'm actually ready for school. I've got this group thing tomorrow, but I don't know if going will increase the drama and inner turmoil I feel, or help me be ok with everyone/everything again. I mean, will I want to stay in this group? or will I want to just give up?

I was talking to the old leader of the group and she's having a lot of trouble with the new leader too. Amazingly, having other people mad at the new leader doesn't help with my feelings one bit. Just because I'm right doesn't make me feel better. In this instance, I would rather be wrong.